Saturday 14 January 2017

Bad Moms

How many films have we had based around juvenile party-animal men? Too many. But how many have we had based around women? A small handful. Obviously, it’s time for another. Bad Moms gets off to a great start by not starring Melissa McCarthy, but is there anything else here to recommend?

I’m not going to accuse Bad Moms of being sexist towards men although it arguably is, nor am I going to say that this is a film exclusively made for women – because nothing is only for a certain gender, or group of people. However, it’s obvious from the start that Bad Moms is, largely, an outlet for frustrated housewives. This is basically an hour and a half of women saying how hard it is to be mothers and how shit their husbands are…I’m sure it’s relatable for a lot of women but, for me, this was a rather uncomfortable watch.

Mila Kunis, Family Guy’s Meg, plays Amy – an overworked successful woman and mother of two. After learning her husband has been cheating on her and everything seems against her, she decides to throw aside her responsibilities and party like an animal with two other stressed mothers (Kathryn Hahn and Kristen Bell). Cue an endless onslaught of silly antics, swearing and partying…Have you ever seen Bridesmaids, or Sisters? Then you’ve seen Bad Moms. Except Sisters and Bridesmaids are quite good. This is fucking dreadful.

Something about Bad Moms just didn’t work, and the whole thing fell apart around it. Mainly, this was down to the film’s attempt at a message. It would occasionally try and make a deep and insightful comment about what it means to be a mother, then it’d almost instantly spoil it with a cock joke. Bad Moms has some things to say about parenting and responsibility, but it can’t quite make its voice heard over the sound of shit jokes. The attempts at giving this film heart and soul are utterly futile, and laughable. 

Bad Moms has some jokes that land, granted – but this is a film where almost every line is a joke.  And the more jokes a film has, the more opportunity for them to flat. And when almost all of them do fall flat, it makes for a cringeworthy viewing experience. It’s almost exhausting how unfunny the majority of Bad Moms is. It’s awful. It’s like a form of punishment. What did I do to deserve this?

I have nothing positive to say about Bad Moms. Call me the Ebeneezer Scrooge of vagina jokes, but I humbugged my way though this without even a smirk. It was just a miserable 90 minutes. I guess the cast aren’t that bad – Kunis and Bell especially try their best, while Hahn becomes an irritation. But the fault of Bad Moms lies with Jon Lucas and Scott Moore’s screenplay. Aswell as creating The Hangover, this pair were behind 21 & Over – a film referred to as ‘too predictable, too unabashedly profane, and too inconsistently funny’. These comments could easily be mistaken for a Bad Moms review.

Bad Moms is an uncomfortably bad, cliché-stuffed juvenile comedy…but again, I don’t think I’m really the target audience here. It’s not my place to say who the target audience is but I’m sure there will be some people out there who will love this – and great, if you enjoy it, good for you! But if you’re anything like me, you will hate every second of it. And each second feels like a minute. Which means this film feels like 5,400 minutes. That’s 90 hours. That’s longer than the fucking Sopranos. And I don’t think The Sopranos would’ve been so watchable if it was a constant stream of vagina jokes…

You’ll be pleased to know Bad Moms is getting a sequel, and a male spin-off called, unsurprisingly, Bad Dads. I’ll be sure to let you know how much I hate them when they come out... But until then, Bad Moms walks away with a stinky 1/5.


Sam Love

Bad Moms at CeX

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