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At the end of season six of New Girl, I was fairly content and ready to let go of the charming comedy that had kept me entertained for the last seven years. Everything felt settled into place and all the characters’ stories appeared to have come to an end. After several failed relationships, Jess (Zooey Deschanel) and Nick (Jake Johnson) finally cut the crap and realised they were meant to be together (which I think literally every fan has been waiting for since the beginning). Cece (Hannah Simone) and Schmidt (Max Greenfield) were married with a baby on the way and even Winston was engaged. So, was another season really needed?
Season seven skips forward ‘about 3 years’ and almost acts as a prequel to the previous seasons to remind us that life carries on after these momentous events. Despite the gang growing up, the stuff that they get up to in this season is equally as comical and absurd as it was seven years ago. This series brings a cat funeral, questionable moustaches and one final round of ‘True American.’ Even Coach (Damon Wayans Jr.) makes a final appearance. As a New Girl fan, this season really made my heart swell. Whilst it still had twists and turns that kept me on my toes, I felt as though the time I had invested into New Girl was worth it just to see a happy ending.
The only disappointing part of this season was how short it was. It only contains a measly eight episodes, not even coming close to the twenty-two episodes every other season features. That being said, I think I was probably just being a bit greedy by wanting more as it actually does a great job at saying goodbye to the gang in such few episodes.
Overall, the final season of New Girl was just as enjoyable as the last six seasons. Whilst I’m not entirely sure it was all that necessary, I’m never going to complain about another season of a great show. It brings the gang together for one final, weird and heart-warming goodbye. If it doesn’t leave you smiling, then I’ll be damned.
Don’t let the PEGI 7 age rating of this game fool you into thinking it is a child’s game. This is easily one of the hardest games I have ever attempted to play in my life. The aim of the game is simple: break into your neighbour’s house and see what he is hiding in his basement without getting caught. Whilst that may sound straightforward, there is a whole bunch of obstacles in your way which in turn make this the most frustrating game. The game consists of three acts, all of which contain different layouts that get more complex as the game progresses.
At first, I thought I was doing quite well. Despite having little instruction, I’d managed to enter the house unscathed and have a good run around before getting caught. However, after what felt like 2048585 attempts to even get anywhere near the basement, I was about ready to give up. A lot of the game relies on illogical puzzles that are more based on ‘trial and error’ than they are strategy. One of the main issues is the game never really explains your full capabilities. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t want step by step instructions. But a few more hints of pointers wouldn’t have gone amiss and probably would’ve made the game a little bit more enjoyable. Another thing that made the game even harder than it needed to be was the point of view. Everything was so zoomed in! Normally I’d favour a first person perspective, but this one left me with absolutely no spatial awareness. I often found myself running into walls or random objects which ultimately just meant I kept getting caught.
The thing that appealed to me initially about this game was the promise of ‘horror’. For me, a key element of horror is suspense. However, after you’ve been caught over and over again, any suspense or surprise is gone which meant the game lost its appeal slightly. That being said, as the game progressed into the final act, the game had more of a sinister feel to it that definitely satisfied my craving for horror and creepiness.
As annoying as this game was, it did keep me entertained for a long time (which is a miracle for me). It also was great to play with a group of people, everybody had different ideas and solutions for the problems – most of which didn’t work, but hey, you can’t have everything. So, if you can deal with being frustrated for a few hours (or days), then go ahead and find what’s lurking in that basement.
There have been a lot of mixed reviews about the recent spate of Netflix films to grace our screens – some have been praised by many, whereas others have been seen as disappointing. Netflix’s newest title, ‘Annihilation’ (directed and written by Alex Garland, known for ‘Ex Machina’), is one example that shows just how much potential their films have, and why we should be paying attention to the originals as well as the myriad of other films they show on their streaming service.
Set in the US, mysterious forces are about as a quarantine zone labelled as The Shimmer is getting bigger and playing havoc with the local wildlife and flora. Military scientists at Area X, a base nearby, are trying their hardest to keep it under wraps from the public, but every team they send in fails to return about from one lone individual, presenting more questions than answers. That individual is Kane (Oscar Isaac), an Army Special Forces Soldier who manages to get back to his wife Lena (Natalie Portman) before showing serious side effects that result in them both quarantined within Area X. Lena is recruited by psychologist Dr. Ventress (Jennifer Jason Leigh) due to her biological expertise, and she joins a group of female scientists who venture into The Shimmer, determined to reach a lighthouse where they believe the answers lie.
The concept of The Shimmer itself is really interesting – we learn early on that it affects radio signals, time perceptions, and living creatures within its vicinity. It’s a complete mystery even to those with expertise, and the viewer is never any wiser. It reminded me in a way of ‘Arrival’, directed by Denis Villeneuve – an intelligent and thought-provoking concept that explores deep and troubling questions regarding humanity, rather than just action and physical conflict.
I thought it was a very good move by the team to focus on an all-female cast for a change, giving the film a sense of female empowerment for an area that’s typically male-dominated. The characters are all relatable and easy to connect with, from the fiery paramedic Anya (Gina Rodriguez) to the much quieter physicist Josie (Tessa Thompson). Portman is excellent as expected and the rest of the cast give stellar performances in their roles, with a particularly good portrayal of emotional tension within the group.
The storyline is also highly enjoyable, filled with twists and turns that lead you ever-deeper into the tangled web of reality. Despite its originality, it’s both believable and fascinating, leading you to want to know more about the whys of the film rather than just the whats. It’s also brilliantly directed with a combination of beautiful cinematography and stunning CGI, which plays quite a big role given the effects we discover from The Shimmer later on in the film. I wasn’t expecting quite so much gore, with one scene that still just won’t budge from my mind, but I’d say that’s a good thing as it’s done well and is certainly memorable.
‘Annihilation’ is one of the best films I’ve seen from Netflix so far, with an ambitious premise and wonderful performances all round. It’s a great concept for a modern sci-fi film, and I’m definitely now looking forward to what Netflix will bring out next.
‘Escape Plan 2: Hades’, directed by Steven C. Miller, is the sequel to ‘Escape Plan’ and is out now on DVD. Ray Breslin (Sylvester Stallone) is the leader of a team of elite security specialists who are able to break people out of any prison, even if maximum security. After a mission doesn’t quite go to plan, new guy Jasper (Wes Chatham) is removed from the group for taking a risk that didn’t quite pay off. The next mission to face the team is an unfortunate one, as Breslin’s most trusted operative, Shu (Xiaoming Huang), is kidnapped due to the actions on his brother Yusheng (Chen Tang). FInding themselves trapped in the most elaborate prison known to man, the two brothers have to rely on Breslin and his team to help break them out.
The original ‘Escape Plan’ wasn’t exactly brilliant, so I didn’t have high hopes for this one. Which was probably a good thing, though somehow the film still managed to disappoint. It’s hard to know where to start, but the main issue was really that the plot just wasn’t that interesting - it was hard to become invested because I didn’t really like any of the characters, and they didn’t develop much over the course of the film. The acting wasn’t good either, and so this made it even harder to want to watch the characters succeed.
The filming was also particularly bad, and perhaps even the worst I’ve seen this year. The first part felt like it an extreme version of the Nashville filter from Instagram over it, and once we got inside the prison it somehow went even more downhill. The prison itself was designed to be futuristic and purely technological, yet it came out looking like a budget ‘Tron’. The strobe lighting encased in every wall was so lurid at points it actually started to give me a bit of a headache, which as you can imagine was rather distracting from the story.
It also didn’t help that the filming technique was shoddy at best (again not helping the headache), and the CGI so terrible that flames in the first scene were just blobs of colour on the screen, and the electrocution within the prison felt reminiscent of the 80s. Every so often the scenes would cut to these bizarre CGI graphics mid-conversation, and it just looked so amateur. There were a couple of shots that could have looked quite good, particularly once the obvious twist was revealed near the middle, but they were dwarfed by the rest of the failings within the film.
A lot of it was just cringe-inducing, with lacklustre writing and a whole collection of different clichés and tropes that it really didn’t need, such as terrible one-liners and explanations of backstory done so obviously that it was almost embarrassing to listen to. A definite case of telling rather than showing, which to me is an immediate no when it comes to any form of storytelling. I think the film also wins “Worst soundtrack of the year” from me as well - the music was far too loud compared to the rest of the audio (leading to a lot of misheard lines), and it was so intense and grating that all it did was take away from each scene. Sometimes less is definitely more, and the crew could really have learnt from that lesson with this one.
I like to think that I’m usually quite lenient when I review films, but I really struggled to come up with something positive for ‘Escape Plan 2: Hades’. There’s definitely better ways to spend a $20m budget and it’s shocking that such a bad film can be produced when there are much better ones out there with budgets at less than a tenth of that. My advice? Avoid this one, or you might find you’ll also need a quick escape.
Out now on PS4, the ‘Yakuza’ series has finally graced us with a new instalment of the franchise. ‘Yakuza 6: The Song of Life’ follows the story of Kazuma Kiryu as he once again tries to get out of the Yakuza, and instead gets pulled back into a war between the Yakuza triads and the Korean mafia. Thrown into the mix is that Kiryu now finds himself the guardian of one year old Haruto, the child of his adopted daughter Haruka. Like the other games in the series, it is set in Kamorocho, Tokyo, but also a completely new area, Onomichi in Hiroshima,
This is the first game in the ‘Yakuza’ series which is on the new engine, which has both positives and negatives. On the plus side, there’s no loading screens in between fights anymore, and the world is absolutely beautiful and very accurate to the bustling streets of Tokyo. However, the new engine means that the game does lose some of the original character that made it such a cult hit.
The fight system has now been really streamlined, meaning that there’s only one fighting style as opposed to the option of switching between Brawler, Dragon, Rush, and Beast. Whenever you do any sort of activity in the city you earn five different types of experience which then feed into your stats, but also skills for fighting. You can still use your environment to your advantage, utilising chairs, bikes, and so on to smash into your enemy's face, and you can also perform heat actions, which are special moves that you unlock as you build up your skill. The fighting feels weighted and powerful, but some fun is lost from the lack of styles.
As always, the narrative is engrossing and full of twists and turns. A lot of past characters make appearances in this one so you could find yourself lost if you haven’t played the previous ones, however, the main narrative does represent itself as a standalone story and, although it’s better if you’ve played the whole lot, it’s still excellent if you haven’t. During the first few chapters of the story you see a side to Kiryu that’s never really been exhibited before as he learns how to take care of a small child, which leads to some interesting scenes and some really hilarious moment (such as Kiryu handing the baby over to a stranger just before every street brawl). The series has always combined serious with funny and this time it’s done particularly well.
Of course, the game wouldn’t be part of the franchise without the plethora of side activities available, from a baseball sim to bowling and even a slightly surreal live chat room game (I won’t spoil it for you, but I can promise a highly Japanese experience). There’s plenty of side activities to distract you from the story, and you could certainly spend hours exploring the city without advancing through the main quest.
‘Yakuza’ is genuinely one of the most underrated series of all time, and as the first real entry on the PS4 it’s easily one of my favourite new games to date. It manages to pull together so many different plot threads into a cohesive and mature story, with an explosive ending that will not disappoint.
‘The Commuter’ is the latest film directed by Jaume Collet-Serra (‘House of Wax’, ‘The Shallows’). Liam Neeson plays Michael MacCauley, an insurance salesman with many financial ties who goes to his job one day only to discover that ten years of loyalty and hard work have still resulted in him being dismissed. Worried about his son’s college fees he’s initially unable to tell his wife, Karen (Elizabeth McGovern) about it, but promises himself he’ll discuss it when he gets home.
This never happens though as, on board his regular commuter train, MacCauley is approached by a mysterious woman who poses a hypothetical question to him - asking him to find a person on the train and receive $100k in cash. There’s only one snag though, which is that he won’t know what happens to the stranger once they are found. MacCauley initially refuses but finds himself trapped in the scenario anyway, having to use his ex-cop knowledge in a race against time.
A lot of people say that if you’ve seen one Liam Neeson film then you’ve seen them all, and sadly in the case of ‘The Commuter’ then this holds quite true. It’s a shame because I really do think that Neeson can be a great actor, but he just takes on films that don’t use his potential and rehash the same type of story over and over again. The start of the film was actually quite different (in a good way) and was well done, but about halfway through it really started to turn. Once the climax started to play out it went downhill very fast, feeling more like a straight to DVD B movie than a film with such a well-known actor as the lead.
I think the root of the problem is that the story, while interesting, is quite cliché, and this makes certain plot twists fairly obvious. The filming style confused me as it really varied in quality, though leaned more towards the amateur side. Some scenes, such as when MacCauley gets on the train ride home were done quite well and really induced anxiety in the viewer, whereas other scenes looked like they’d been created by that college student that’s just discovered depth of field and the trial version of Adobe Premier. The editing wasn’t great either, making some cuts feel rushed and other parts look unrealistic.
One part I particularly liked was the introduction,, which is where I feel most of the effort had gone into. It was filmed well, with great acting and good use of character development and backstory (something that is often vitally missing from these sorts of films). The fight scenes were also choreographed well, although were easily forgotten amidst some more extreme scenes towards the end that I won’t spoil for you but appeared to have been conjured up by Michael Bay.
Despite only being 1hr 45mins long, once the halfway point was hit the film really started to drag. It was ambitious and probably a good idea to begin with, however it was overdone so much that unfortunately, it turned out to be a bit of a trainwreck.
‘Vampyr’ is the latest game from Don’t Nod Studios, who created ‘Life Is Strange’. It combines the storytelling of ‘Life Is Strange’ with an action RPG system to create an interesting experience set in London in the early 1900s. You play as Jonathan Reid, a doctor who has just come home from the war and found himself attacked on the way back to London, which converts him to a vampire. After immediately doing something you regret you then go on a journey of revenge, which ultimately leads to you trying to save London from an outbreak of disease.
If you’ve played ‘Life Is Strange’ previously, the storytelling of ‘Vampyr’ is really where it flourishes. The subject matter and the way it is told is quite unique as there aren’t actually many vampire-themed games out there, and the choices you make have meaningful consequences within the narrative. This is especially seen on one of the gameplay mechanisms where, if you’re at a high enough level, you can feed on and kill any NPCs at any time. This then has a big effect on the areas within the game, as it can lead to monsters spawning more frequently if a particular area becomes devoid of NPCs to keep it stable.
Although the story has lots of twists and turns and is largely unpredictable, one side of the game that is quite predictable in nature is the combat system. Now, ‘Vampyr’ is not an AAA game and doesn’t have an AAA budget so some gameplay is quite rough around the edges and that is to be expected – the combat is similar to ‘Dark Souls’ in that you have a main attack, a secondary attack, dodging, and sometimes parrying, and skills matched to different controller buttons. While you are given a wide array of options, after 20 to 30 hours or so it starts to feel repetitive as you are set upon by more and more bullet sponge bosses with extended health pools. I felt that the combat let the other aspects of the game down towards the end – at points you feel like you’re suffering through the fighting scenes just to get to the interesting story points.
The graphic style of the game is what you would expect from an AA budget. It’s not perfect, of course, but what it lacks in graphical fidelity it certainly makes up for with an excellent gothic recreation of early 1900s London, which will naturally entice anyone that has an interest in the gothic themes of that area, or simply vampires in general.
The most interesting mechanic is feeding on NPCs – doing so gives you a large amount of XP and can be increased by finding out secrets about them and/or completing quests for them to gain their trust. The XP boost is great but you have to balance this with keeping the district safe (meaning you can’t chomp on the entire town, sadly). Not feeding regularly makes the game much more difficult, so the developers have done really well here by creating an internal conflict between completing the game whilst also wanting to retain a strong moral compass.
Character development is also largely influenced by feeding – depending on your choices made at major plot points, you will change not only visually but also in terms of interactions with others characters. It leads to you really caring about the characters and you find yourself trying everything you can to not feed on some of them (though I’ll admit this didn’t always work for me – some characters definitely deserved a cheeky bite or two).
Overall ‘Vampyr’ is an exceedingly ambitious title for the studio and, despite some issues, pulls off what it’s trying to do most of the time. It’s got a lot of heart, and you can tell that the developers have a real passion for intriguing storytelling – an aspect where it really punches above its weight.
It’s a thought that repeatedly crossed my mind during the first act of Pacific Rim: Uprising. The inciting incident this time round is a rogue Jager, which attacks a demonstration intending to replace Jagers and pilots with drone equivalents. (Incidentally, the Jager reinforcements take too long to arrive to successfully take down the rogue, that I’m sure you can already work out the remarkably obvious twist from that information alone.)
The ensuing Jager on Jager fight deftly showed-off the blocking and composition, making use of foreground objects to really emphasize scale, but also ensured a sense of location during the chaos; the action was cohesive and impactful as a result.
Still… robot on robot felt like a step back from the variety of absurd and imaginative kaiju from the previous film, and yet Uprising opts for a lighter, more carefree tone nonetheless. Dissonance, I suppose, and it did strike me as odd that I was this distracted by it as a giant robot punched another giant robot.
Then began act two. The obvious twist obviously revealed itself, with a moderately surprising, if minor, second twist. Things began falling into place from that point. For the sake of clarity, I’ll spoil one moment (skip to the next paragraph if you intend to go in blind). The Jager drones begin attacking the base (the wonderfully named Shattterdome), before morphing into Jager-kaiju hybrids.
That was the moment, the moment that caused me to slap my forehead and laugh. Are we doing this? Yeah, we’re really doing this. And, I was pleased to discover that this was the first of a few moments that would trigger the same reaction.
Pacific Rim: Uprising starts off weak, threatening to step away from the successes of the prior film.
The action has shifted from colourful-by-night central Hong Kong to daytime Tokyo. More thematically appropriate, true, but Tokyo by day results in a flat, grey arena. Maybe a trivial point, but without the high-contrast purple, green, and red lights of Hong Kong, Uprising loses a lot the striking visuals. As the absurdity sets in, however, it really does start to evoke the 1960s era of Gamera and Ultraman.
Still, to return to my previous point, Pacific Rim: Uprising does indeed become stupid enough to be thoroughly enjoyable once the narrative ditches any pretence of being surprising. And once it does. This is about to happen? This is about to happen. This is nonsense. This is great.
It truly amazes me just how many TV shows hit our screens each year. Naturally, there will always be a lot – there are a lot of hours to fill in a year, and television channels run almost 24/7! But it’s crazy looking at the list of shows renewed or cancelled each year and thinking just how many of them you’ve never even heard of, let alone never seen. This show was one that I’d certainly never heard of. If ever there were a show that is absolutely not made with people like me in mind, it is The Bold Type. But surprisingly, there was actually some quality here that is worth discussing. But there’s a lot of shit, too.
Inspired by the life of former Cosmopolitan editor-in-chief Joanna Coles, The series centres on three friends – Jane (Katie Stevens), Kat (Aisha Dee), and Sutton (Meghann Fahy) – who all work for Scarlet, a global women's magazine. The show explores their outrageous lives in New York City as they learn to find their own voices and explore their sexuality, identity, love, and fashion. Acting as a fairly accurate glimpse into the outrageous lives and loves of those responsible for a global women's magazine, we enter the personal lives of these women and their struggles and success in equal measure.
Now, first of all, this is a feminist show. Three-dimensional female leads with oodles of depth are a rare thing indeed at the moment, but The Bold Type delivers them in spades. Romances are important to the plot but secondary to the characters’ ambition, career progression and personal successes. Not only that, but the diversity in the characters’ representation is incredible – there are characters of all colours, backgrounds and sexualities. This is a rare show when it comes to the roster of varied characters, which is an impressive and respectable feat that earns the show a couple of stars in itself. These characters are far more than the usual stereotype of catty women obsessed with men, and that is incredibly important in these divisive times. Everything about this show looks predictable and unoriginal on the surface – but the characters certainly manage to subvert expectations repeatedly throughout the first season.
The main message of this show, the idea of empowerment and fighting against misogyny and sexism, is something we can all get behind, regardless of gender or background. But unfortunately, the show is far from perfect outside of this message. While the characters are certainly strongly written and would pass the Bechdel test with flying colours, the plotlines of the show often leave a lot to be desired. There aren’t particularly big stakes to the story and there’s nothing particularly engrossing to keep the audience coming back. While a lot of shows are style over substance, this is message over substance. The writers seem to think that the premise alone is enough to hold the show up. But unfortunately, it isn’t.
These characters could go very far in future, but this debut season acts as a very drawn out introduction and not much else. A second and third season have been confirmed, so the future could be bright for these ladies. But the writers will have to think of far better ways to keep the audience coming back for more.
In this painful remake-filled world, it seems like there is no limit to what the film and television industry is happy to shit all over. Even shows that were pretty shit to begin with, like MacGyver (which ran from 1985-1992), are being rebooted and made even worse. In 2016, Peter M. Lenkov developed this particular reboot which took the television equivalent of a festival urinal and took a massive shit in it. Ah, I feel mean. The original MacGyver wasn’t that bad. But this reboot certainly is. Despite being renewed for a second season in 2017 and a third season in 2018, this abomination shouldn’t have even got funding, to begin with. I’ll start by quoting IMDb user Nicki Fellenzer’s user review on that website, who starts her review by bluntly stating “five minutes into the show, I wanted to throat punch the arrogant, millennial twerp in the title role”. And she’s being polite.
For those who’ve never seen an episode of the original series, the show follows Angus "Mac" MacGyver - an operative of a secret U.S. government organization with an extraordinary talent for problem-solving and an extensive knowledge of science, both being skills he uses to save lives. But primarily, his talent is creativity, saving the day using paper clips instead of pistols, birthday candles instead of bombs, and gum instead of guns. Lucas Hill (Havok in the recent X-Men films) takes the role of MacGyver and basically beats all the charm out of it with a baseball bat, delivering a performance that is painfully devoid of any of original star Richard Dean Anderson’s personality. I know, I know, this is a reboot and Hill probably wanted to make the character his own – but he missed the mark completely and turned the character into an unwatchable bellend. In the original series, MacGyver was likeable. Humble, kind, fun. Now, he’s a brash and obnoxious little tit. This problem lies primarily with the writing, sure – but it’s not MacGyver. It’s MacArsehole.
Cheesy enough to make the lactose intolerant ill by contact alone, this reboot is utterly painful to watch. Clunky dialogue, exposition and bland plots make each episode worse than the last one, with every minute of the show feeling like an hour. The wooden acting is like something of the SyFy channel, and the low stakes make every mission tedious and unengrossing. Not only that, but the show takes no time to build any sort of interest or suspense. Back in the original, MacGyver’s homemade mission-saving contraptions took time to piece together and the editing of the series made this an interesting part of each episode. The audience didn’t know how Mac would save the day, and we’d be watching him put his gizmo together with suspense. “What’s he doing with that paper clip? Maybe he’ll connect it to…oh, no, perhaps he’ll…wait…”. But in the new series, he just bungs things together in seconds and f*cks off. Then reminds us in the voiceover how amazing he is.
And yet, somehow, MacGyver is currently gearing up for its third season – despite critical panning and declining ratings. Shows like Deadwood and Hannibal get cancelled, leaving fans clinging to the hope of a wrap-up film, while shit like this continues to smugly pump out episodes. There is no justice in this world. If you’re a fan of the original MacGyver, or anything resembling quality in general, steer clear of this disgrace.
In recent years, LGBT cinema has been picking up real steam with mainstream audiences. After the enormous success – financially, critically and on the awards circuit – of Call Me By Your Name, we are finally in a time when Hollywood has realised that cinema doesn’t have to be totally straight. Sure, there are still niggling issues – the media caught wind of how both Thor: Ragnarok and Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom opted against using filmed gay references and left them on the cutting room floor, but we’re certainly getting into a new territory for cinema. The absolutely fantastic Love, Simon is another milestone in these historic times for LGBT film, as it is the first film by a major Hollywood studio to focus on a gay teenage romance. The first one. In 2018…
As the film’s marketing so accurately states, everyone deserves a great love story. But for our hero, the 17-year-old Simon (Nick Robinson), it's a little more complicated. He hasn't told his family or friends that he's gay. One day, Simon’s friend Leah (Katherine Langford) informs him about an online confession of a closeted gay student at their high school, known only by the pseudonym "Blue". Hiding behind the name "Jacques", Simon begins communicating with him via email. This turns into something of a mystery whodunit, but without the dun. A “whoisit”, perhaps? But along the way, Simon must embark on a terrifying and often hilarious adventure of self-discovery, delivering the greatest coming of age high school story since John Hughes was doing the rounds.
Firstly, we’ve got to talk about Nick Robinson. Known presumably to most audiences as one of the youngsters from Jurassic World, Robinson puts in a thoroughly convincing and engrossing performance here that could well earn him awards recognition. This lad could go far. Love, Simon is entirely his film, stealing every scene he’s in and even putting in a pretty good attempt to steal scenes he isn’t in! That’s not to say the rest of the cast aren’t superb too – the film’s ensemble cast is bursting with talent. Well-written, directed and, as discussed, acted, this is a masterpiece of the LGBT genre and one that could become a classic in the youth/coming-of-age circuit. It deserves the hype, the acclaim and the millions of dollars it earned at the box office.
But unfortunately, it’s not quite plain sailing for LGBT film just yet. I live in a very small town and am lucky enough to be the programmer of our cinema. I decided, upon the film’s release, to give Love, Simon a handful of screenings. Looking back at the previous 12 months of our cinema admissions, Love, Simon came in as our lowest earner. Only 5 tickets sold in total. The 5 who came absolutely loved the film, but LGBT cinema has always struggled in this town – perhaps due to an ageing population with a rather “of another generation” worldview. But these figures act as a rather cruel reminder of a great number of people’s lack of acceptance of gay cinema. There’s a long way to go. But the mere fact that key filmmakers and stars are finally getting well-and-truly involved in delivering these stories is fantastic, and I say – the more, the better!
This film is a belter and one I cannot recommend enough. It’s not quite Call Me By Your Name quality which docks it one star, but still, this is a remarkable film full of charming brilliance. Love, Simon is a truly terrific little film and one that absolutely deserves a spot in your collection.
We live in a post-2016-version-of-Suicide-Squad world. Can you remember life before it? I remember the enormous marketing campaign that seemed to last for years before the film’s release, and I sat back and watched as thousands – nay, millions – of people online lost their proverbial shit with excitement. This was going to be the greatest film they had ever seen, it seemed. And then it was released. And it was everything the fans hoped it wouldn’t be. Yes, DC had done it again. They’d taken remarkable source material and turned it into utter pants. This year, director Sam Liu attempted to right the 2016 adaptation’s wrongs with the 31st entry in the DC Universe Animated Original Movies series.
Suicide Squad: Hell To Pay covers a special group of imprisoned villains being brought together by Amanda Waller to assemble Task Force X, assigned with the mission of retrieving a mystical object. Deadshot, Harley Quinn, Bronze Tiger, Captain Boomerang, Killer Frost, and Copperhead risk their lives to find the powerful object. Sure, the plot isn’t particularly interesting. But when is it ever with films like this? And especially with a Suicide Squad film – does the plot matter? We’re just here to see violent carnage, and in Hell To Pay, we get that in spades.
Here’s a film that absolutely deserves its 15 rating. Copious amounts of murder and bad language fill the films 86 minutes in a way that would make Quentin Tarantino proud. Not only that, but there is some real Game of Thrones-level danger to keep us on the edges of our seats. Any character can drop at any time, and indeed do. On the film’s commentary track, executive producer James Tucker warns viewers not to get attached to any of the characters and its bloody good advice. There is a lot of bloodshed here, something that the 2016 adaptation was strongly lacking in its colourful and ‘fun’ delivery.
Despite the team appearing in Batman: Assault on Arkham, this is the first animated movie based on the Suicide Squad, set within the DCAU. Featuring an original story by Alan Burnett, Hell To Pay acts as an introductory film for these characters within the animated universe – and what a great introduction it is. But it’s hardly going to go down in history as a masterpiece. At the end of the day, the visuals aren’t perfect and with several of these animated comic book films seemingly coming out every month, there’s always going to be a bigger and better one just around the corner. But for the time being, this one is certainly worth checking out.
Quite simply, Hell To Pay absolutely is the film that 2016’s Suicide Squad should, and indeed could, have been. A dark, bloody and brutal adaptation of the dark, bloody and brutal characters, Hell To Pay is one of the strongest DC adventures in years. Even if you’re not remotely interested in comic book films, give this one a go – the grittiness and violence should make you realise that comics aren’t just for kids after all. Forget the 2016 adaptation ever happened. We have Hell To Pay now.
Where do I begin with Pitch Perfect 3? Well, I suppose I can start with a very simple warning. Do not watch Pitch Perfect 3. Just don’t. There is literally nothing to recommend in this utterly soulless cash-grab. Everything about it makes me angry and sad – both moods earned by the fact that this film exists, before even delving into its vast lack of quality. It’s just a bloody awful film. But at least it is the end of the Pitch Perfect saga. While my review should – and indeed, could – end there, it’s only fair to look at the film in a little more detail and find out just why it is one of 2018’s worst releases.
I’m absolutely not the target audience for Pitch Perfect 3, I admit. But I’m man enough to say when a romantic comedy or a musical is a good film, whether it’s my cup of tea or not. Here, it doesn’t take a genius to tell you that quality here is non-existent. For those of you out there who are interested, the film takes place after the highs of winning the world championships, with the Bellas finding themselves split apart and discovering there aren't really any job prospects for making music with your mouth. But when they get the chance to reunite for an overseas USO tour, our group of heroines will come together to make some music, and some questionable decisions, one last time.
If that sounds like an entertaining 93 minutes then read no further, pop the DVD in and you’ll probably have a great time. Because there’s absolutely nothing else to it – and not in a fun mindless entertainment way, but a depressing Hollywood-has-come-to-this way. This is a painful viewing experience. But, as is custom in Hollywood, this shit still made millions. With a gross of $184 million, Pitch Perfect 3 is the second-highest-grossing musical comedy of all time, second only to bloody Pitch Perfect 2. Damn it people, stop paying to see these films! Unless of course *shameless marketing incoming* you want to buy a copy from us, in which case yes, do pay to see this film. You’ll love it! It’s a masterpiece! It’s one of the best- I can’t do it. I can’t bring myself to compliment Pitch Perfect 3 in any way. I feel so dirty even joking about it.
But in all seriousness, avoid Pitch Perfect 3 at all costs. You will hate every second of this torturous 93 minutes of awful jokes, cheesy characters and shit music. You can do a lot better than this. Unless you have ridiculously low standards, like my girlfriend - who is seemingly very happy with me. There is absolutely nothing to like here. When asked about whether this is truly the end of Pitch Perfect or not, director Trish Sie said “as far as I’m concerned, I would see these movies on and on and on until they start sucking”. Well, Trish, I hate to break it to you, but this one ‘sucked’. It was almost offensively bad and it made me feel ill. Please don’t make another one. Please.
If there’s any justice in this world, this is the end of Pitch Perfect forever.
There are certain basic truths in Hollywood, and the truest of them all is that you absolutely cannot make a good film based on a video game. You can throw as many lauded filmmakers and talented stars as you want at them, but they’re just cursed. It’s a curse that cannot be broken, even by filmmakers like Justin Kurzel (Assassin’s Creed), Duncan Jones (Warcraft) and Mike Newell (Prince of Persia). These films simply always have been, and always will be, the shit on cinema’s shoe. But as long as Hollywood exists, money will keep getting blindly thrown at these adaptations in futile attempts to break the curse.
This year, we were subjected to another onslaught of Lara Croft action in a fresh reboot on the film franchise, based specifically on the more recent games. But while the character of Lara and her adventures should easily lend themselves to film, here we find ourselves again with our heads in our hands as we attempt to endure 118 minutes of exposition, dreadful dialogue, predictable twists and totally unexciting action set-pieces. Presenting a grittier and more realistic take on the games than the Angelina Jolie efforts, this Tomb Raider follows our heroine as she embarks on her first grand adventure to uncover the mystery of her father’s disappearance on the island of Yamatai. Here, she meets a psychotic rival archaeologist of Lara’s father and a member of shadowy organisation Trinity. Then it just becomes every action thriller ever. There’s literally nothing that makes this Tomb Raider stand out from the pack in any way, to the point where it feels like everyone involved knows that and has made peace with it.
That said, Alicia Vikander is a terrific Lara Croft for 2018. The Oscar-winning actress puts in a decent performance and certainly looks the part, while Walton Goggins steals the show (as he so often does) as villain Vogel. But on the whole, there aren’t any particularly exciting performances here. The acting is fine, but nowhere near awards calibre. I’m not suggesting it should be for an action thriller, but when the action is bland and the thrills tame, without at least some acting chops the film falls apart.
I know, I can almost hear you saying “but films like this are just supposed to be fun, they’re not trying to win Oscars” – I understand that, but this wasn’t even fun. It was painfully paced (I thought at least an hour had passed when I hit the 30minute mark), predictable and unengrossing. They say the sign of a good film is one that transports you so intensely into its world, you have no grasp of time. You don’t check your watch, and when the ending comes, you’re surprised. I spent more time looking at my watch than the screen when I was watching Tomb Raider. I think that says it all.
So, in conclusion, would I recommend Tomb Raider? I’d recommend the games, sure. Who wouldn’t? But this film is an abomination of cookie-cutter ‘entertainment’ that was tediously uninteresting for every single one of its 118 minutes. To quote the late great Bill Hicks, “I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out”. I watched Tomb Raider so you don’t have to, and spent the next 24 hours in the shower desperately trying to wash its stench and filth off of myself. Who knows if I will ever be clean again. I hated Tomb Raider. Can you tell?
Before long, Marvel will be running the world. Everywhere you look, there’s a Marvel film or a Marvel TV show or a Marvel game or, obviously, a Marvel comic. In the last 20 years or so, the brand has really grown to enormous new heights and nowadays, you’d be hard-pressed to find someone who hasn’t seen any of the Marvel adaptations. In this ridiculously crowded subgenre of film & TV (yes, I consider Marvel to be its own genre now), it takes a hell of a lot for something to stand out. But TV series Legion certainly does stand out, thanks to a unique and original delivery.
Based on the Marvel Comics by Chris Claremont and Bill Sienkiewicz, Legion tells the story of David Haller (Dan Stevens), a troubled young man who may be more than human. Diagnosed as schizophrenic as a child, David has been in and out of psychiatric hospitals for years. Now in his early 20s and free once again, David loses himself in the rhythm of the structured regimen of daily life: breakfast, lunch, dinner, therapy, medications, sleep. The pleasant numbness of David's routine is completely upended when a situation arises that leads him to confront the shocking possibility that the voices he hears and the visions he sees may be real.
Legion’s primary influence is clearly the work of David Lynch, and it shows throughout. The series is filmed through Haller’s distorted view of reality, making for an often uncomfortable and chillingly bizarre viewing experience that puts the viewer right into the mind of the lead character. Rarely has this been done so effectively and disturbingly. Not only is the delivery itself surreal and quirky but the set design and costume too. Highly stylized and described by director Noah Hawley as “a 1964 Terence Stamp movie”, Hawley wanted the show to have its own aesthetic and “internal logic”. The 1960s décor and visuals came about after Hawley decided the show wouldn’t be taking place in the world we know as such, but rather “David Haller’s experience of the world. He’s piecing his world together from nostalgia and memory, and the world becomes that”.
Special mention should certainly go to Dan Stevens who makes this role entirely his own and steals every scene. Putting in a phenomenal performance as Haller, he absolutely reinforces the fact that this is not your usual superhero tripe. To have a ‘hero’ who is so dark and mentally twisted and exist in a world so frighteningly surreal and daring, is a very rare thing indeed. The Avengers this ain’t. Legion is often not for the faint of heart, but it is a remarkable feat of television as an art form that transcends the usual genre conventions.
I’ve never been a fan of superhero films or television. I find it all to be too samey, often cheesy and generally unengrossing. Legion is the exact opposite of all three of those traits. Bold, Lynchian and sophisticated, this is a challenging watch for even the most die-hard surrealists. But if you can get into it, you’ll find it to be a powerful and rewarding watch that reminds you what TV is capable of.
Legion is a masterclass of television and a truly stunning piece of work from all involved. Bravo!
